Funny Best Man Speech or toast: How to easily write a very funny best man speech for your brother or friend even if you are not a naturally funny person
Just stick with me for a while and I will share with you everything you need to know about writing a funny best man speech for your brother or friend.
I have been writing and reviewing countless wedding speeches for many years and I can tell you that nothing comes close to the joy that a funny wedding speech gives.
The wedding guests are coming from far and near not to hear you make a funny best man speech per se. But, if you can weave in a few funny anecdotes about your bonds of friendship with the groom in a hilarious way, they would applaud you for making their day.
Given the fact that the wedding crowd loves really funny best man speeches, best men really struggle when asked to deliver a few remarks about the bride and groom.
Having seen that, let’s look at few crippling myths that holds most best men back from writing and delivering funny best man speeches or toasts and how to debunk them so you can make a very hilarious wedding best man toast even if you are as serious as a dead man!
Myth #1: You have to be a funny guy to come up with something humorous. It’s not true as most folks claim. You just have to slot in just one or two funny anecdotes to make it work.
Myth #2: You have to act like a clown to make everyone excited. Not entirely true. You just have to pick a few simple tricks (I am going to share a few with you) comedians employ in their craft and your speech will be as memorable as your first vacation abroad.
Now,
Let’s Look At How To Put Your Thoughts And Feelings Into A Very Funny Best Man Speech Or Toast.
If you have no clue about such best man speeches or toasts are made, then you definitely have to watch a few video clips about how it’s done.
For example, if you don’t know where to start, you can do a quick youtube.com search for best man speeches or toast. I did just that and found these great videos.
Now, this is what I want you to do. Grab your pen and notepad and hit on the play button and watch it like once or more and jot down ideas you feel you can add to your wedding toast.
Here they are:
Funny Best Man Wedding Speech or Toast Video Example #1
Funny Best Man Wedding Speech or Toast Video Example #2
While video examples can help a great deal in the pre-writing process, written best man speech templates have several ideas you can borrow and adapt to your own script.
Well, in the next few lines, we are going to study two examples (best man speech for cousin/brother and a friend). Afterward, we will break it down bit by bit, find out the humorous elements in those templates, and then examine how we can use our discoveries to help you write an amazing best man wedding toast.
Let’s start by looking at the two samples. The first is by a cousin to the groom and the second from a friend to the groom. You may read both or simply scroll further down the page for your preference.
First and foremost, here’s a…
Funny Best Man Speech or Toast for Your Cousin or Brother
I discovered this at www.hitched.co.uk and I am glad to share it with you because it captures the essence of what the writing process is all about.
Good Afternoon ladies and gentleman, for those of you who don't know me, I'm Stephen's cousin and Best Man, Nick.
Before I begin, I'd like to ask Dena to put her hand on the table facing up and for Stephen to put his hand on top of hers. I'll explain later. And if can please hold it there until I after my speech.
I'd like to begin by thanking everyone for participating in this celebration. I would also like to thank Tony and Connie , and Maria and David, for without whom we not have Dena and Stephen. I would also like to express our thanks to Zia and Uncle David for hosting us today.
I can't believe we are here today, it seems like yesterday Stephen and I were playing hockey in the back yard, stickball in the street, and locking ourselves in Stephen's room playing video games for hours on end. I remember my parents used to have to literally drag me away when it was time to go home.
As Jayson had mentioned in the ceremony, it's been 10 years to the day since Stephen and Dena had their first date. Soon after that Dena was attending holiday and Sunday dinners over noni and nono's , but I never really got to spend a lot of time with the two of them until more recently.
Including hanging out in Cambridge, going out to dinner and at one point coming home from work playing, video games for hours on end. Just like old times. It was then I realized that my cousin had found someone that makes him happy and that we had gained a new addition to our family.
I am very proud to be best man here today. You are both generous, intelligent, and passionate people, and I know that your life together will be an inspiration to the rest of us. You are very well matched, and lucky to have found each other.
Now I'm assuming most of you are wondering why I asked the bride and groom to hold their hands together. Stephen, I just wanted to remind you that this is the last time you will have the upper hand.
Would you all please stand and raise your glasses in a toast to Dena and Stephen. To the Bride and Groom
Here’s our second example…
I also saw this at www.hitched.co.uk
Hilarious Best Man Speech or Toast for Your Friend
Ladies and Gentlemen:
Good afternoon, for those who don't know me already, I'm Kiaran, otherly known as Ell's best man, yet I'm clearly not ‘Best’ enough to be given a seat at the top table!
I'm sure you would all agree that everything has been superb so far. Unfortunately, you can't expect perfection on a day like today, which is why you now have me for the next few minutes.
I know what you'll all be expecting from a best man speech, but before we get into any of Ells past, I'd just like to take this opportunity to thank him for his kind words towards the bridesmaids on doing an utterly fantastic job today, each one of you is looking lovely. I'd also like to thank everyone else who has helped make this day special, you all know who you are and I'm positive these two couldn't have done it without you.
Malcolm and Anita, you've always been like a second set of parents to me – even if Malcolm doesn't reciprocate the feelings – but I'd just like to say a special thank you to you Anita from Ell and myself, you've done an unbelievable job with the wedding including being on hand with the hairspray all day. I know it's been tough but I'm pretty sure everyone else is thinking the same thing as me; Ross's hair is looking absolutely fabulous!
I know this must be an extremely nerve-racking moment as parents, seeing your little boy all grown up taking a huge step in life. I agree, delivering a best man speech is a huge deal I and hope I do you proud! Ell, I'm sure they're proud of you too…
Ashleigh, the beautiful bride, you and the dress look absolutely stunning (which does actually makes a pleasant change from the sweaty gym lycra I've become accustomed to the recent times we've seen each other). But even so, with your wit, beauty and elegance, I think everyone will agree that Ell is certainly punching above his weight.
I've known Ell for a long time now; it's around 10 years since we started playing American football together back in school. Not much has changed from being 13 to be honest; he's still 6ft 4, very immature and those shovels he calls hands certainly haven't gotten any smaller!
But it wasn't until I went to college that we became really close friends, back in the days of orange Wednesday ‘man dates’ and Friday nights at Kong sampling Darlington's finest… beer and spirits that is!
Him and me both struggled to catch a cold let alone any of the opposite sex! I know a big part of the best man speech is to laugh and joke at the groom's expense by filling you in about all the stupid and embarrassing things he's done, but I think I might have to try and reign this one in a little bit, just so the guy can still look you all in the eyes after I'm finished.
I'm sure he wouldn't be overly pleased if I spoke about the time he broke into my Uni halls by climbing through a neighbour's kitchen window. And I shouldn't really mention when I picked him up from a night out and had the pleasure of explaining to a local bobby why a steaming 19 year old was hanging out of my passenger window to after getting pulled over.
But there's one thing for certain, I wouldn't dream of embarrassing the lad by detailing his little hot tub accident, some things are just off limits! Ell – you know you've dodged a bullet here!
So with a few incidents only briefly being mentioned, maybe there are some things that I can talk about openly without Ashleigh suddenly regretting saying the phrase ‘I Do’.
He's done some daft things over the years; only 4 weeks ago he managed to walk 10 miles home after the first night of the stag do wearing only one shoe! Venturing through moss side during the early hours of the morning wasn't a very clever idea either, although he did tell me he met some lovely bluds and crips that gave him directions home.
I must say however; spraying a fire extinguisher all over the walls of my uni flat didn't score him very highly with the security blokes! Ell, you do actually still owe me for that btw! We can just call it quits if you like though; mines a double rum and coke and I'll get everyone else's put onto a tab behind the bar for you.
But one particular highlight however has to be crashing his first car into the curb and completely smashing up its front axle. This was due to him having to swerve to avoid a lorry pulling out of a junction..… Well at least that's what he told his dad anyway! In fact, he was racing a mate through the industrial estate trying to overtake on a 90 degree bend. If only Malcolm knew that then, after he'd got his hands on you, you'd of struggled to make it to 18 let alone your wedding day!
But then what about the limited number of girlfriends before Ashleigh, and when I say limited I do mean zero, there was always the thought that maybe Ell valued our friendship a little more than me if you catch my drift.
I remember biking up to High Conny; we took a load of food a drink for a BBQ just thinking it would be a good laugh to camp out for the night. It ended with us sharing a single duvet, on probably one of the coldest nights I've ever experienced in my life, which obviously wasn't a pleasant experience.
Although I must say I did actually enjoy being little spoon, it was quite comfy being cradled by Bigfoot for the night. But before anyone jumps to any conclusions, yes we might be best mates, but we don't quite share the same relationship as Jake Gyllenhall and Heath Ledger in Brokeback Mountain, I'd just like to clear that up!
So as soon as Ashleigh appeared on the scene, it was nice to be reassured that I was never going to be asked by him to wear a diamond ring, so thanks for that Ashleigh!
I'm not sure if many people know this, but Ell and Ashleigh getting together in the first place wasn't by chance or fate as some people might think. Ell put some serious ground work in a good while before I even think she knew his name. Nights out in Newcastle always ended up with him mysteriously getting lost from the group or disappearing from clubs like something out of a Houdini magic trick.
Little did I know that old Casanova over there used to make his way up to Tiger Tiger, which is where Ashleigh worked at the time, just purely so he could order a drink from her as an excuse for a chat!
Well I do tell a lie there, he actually didn't dare speak to her, so usually just stared creepily whilst getting served by another bartender. But look at them both now, newlyweds about to embark on their future journey with each other, some may call that true loves calling, I just call it stalking.
Now with all this being said and jokes aside, Ell, it was a genuine privilege to be asked to play the part of best man at your wedding. You've always been there for me no matter what; to offer a helping hand or a shoulder to cry on when needed, so there was no way on earth I wouldn't have been here for you today.
This a proud day for me, not just to see a best friend, but almost a brother, sat next to the girl of his dreams, newly wed and ready to start their next chapter of life together. I know you will both make each other smile from laughter and stay warm hearted with love in the years to come.
So it is now that I ask you all to join me in raising a glass to toast for one last time.
I wish you both a lifetime of joy and happiness together, and may this day be the beginning of many special memories you look back on in years to come as husband and wife.
To the newlyweds, Mr & Mrs Holt!
Now, let’s get started by taking inspiration from both examples and elsewhere where necessary. Just pick up a pen and notepad and get yourself ready to make notes as we look at how you can make your speech funny with some incredibly funny tips and ideas.
First off, this simple idea can make your opening remarks hilarious.
I got it from the first example.
‘’Good Afternoon ladies and gentleman, for those of you who don't know me, I'm Stephen's cousin and Best Man, Nick.
Before I begin, I'd like to ask Dena to put her hand on the table facing up and for Stephen to put his hand on top of hers. I'll explain later. And if can please hold it there until I after my speech.’’
Don’t you think the guests will love every bit of it if we change that extract into this short narrative?
Before I begin, I'd like to ask (insert name of the bride here) to put her hand on the table facing up and for ((insert name of the groom here) to put his hand on top of hers. Now I'm assuming most of you are wondering why I asked the bride and groom to hold their hands together. (insert name of the groom here), I just wanted to remind you that this is the last time you will have the upper hand since in a good marriage, women always have the upper hand…
Do you realize how personal that is?
Second….
- Imagine grabbing the microphone and introducing yourself like this guy did.
‘’ Hello everyone…this is Mat and I am the oldest, wisest brother of the groom. My brother gave me the nickname Dan The Rabbit when I was five years old because he claims I have the biggest ear in the family!( frown) That’s my claim to fame….Now, let me ask you this: (Groom stands)…Who has the biggest ear? Just compare mine to his …You be the judge!’’
I am sure you almost fell off your chair when you read that, right? That’s not all…
- What if you changed the order of things a bit? For example, if the groom is getting married to a lady from another country where English is not widely spoken, you can learn how to greet the audience in French and English.
That might not make your introduction very funny per se, but it sure would make the guests giggle in excitement and appreciate the fact that you greeted them in their native language.
You might also consider bringing this idea on board to kick start your speech on a humorous note.
- After you’ve introduced yourself in the traditional way or in a more creative way like I showed you above, you can begin by saying: ''I promise that this is going to be the funniest yet shortest best man speech you’ve ever heard or read….Wait a minute…Did I say read? I don’t think you would love to read my wedding speech, right? (comments: As you say that, you can roll down a very long sheet of paper with words on it and jokingly say:
''Seriously, did you believe me when I said that I am going to deliver a short speech considering that he’s been my best friend and brother for 30 years?
I was actually looking for a movie director to make a tribute (turn and look at him in a sheepish manner)….did I say a triiiiibute? I must be going a crazy…Can someone send me to the Emergency Room...I seriously need help…
My comments: If you can employ and rehearse this technique very well, you will get everyone laughing and talking about your speech all night long. If I may ask: which of those ideas do you think can help you start on a cheerful note? Just go for it now!
At this point, let’s dive deep by coming up with ideas about…
How To Write The Body Or Outline Of Your Funny Best Man Toast
At the onset of this write-up, I mentioned that your speech about the groom shouldn’t be funny from the start to the end. But, it should be interspersed with a few good memories to make it stand out. This is also true of what you write about your relationship with the bride and groom.
To make the body of your presentation lively and fun, you can throw in a few incidents you remember about the great time you have had with your friend or brother.
You can easily do that by doing a little brainstorming before writing down answers to the following questions (which you can later use to craft a rough draft) Let’s give our brain something to ponder. As always, grab a pen and note pad and scribble down a few thoughts here and there by providing responses to these queries.
- When did you become friends with the groom?
- What’s his impact on your life?
- When did he start talking to you about the bride to you? Or did he keep it a secret?
- Has the bride being a blessing in his life? If yes, How so? Just write it down
- What would you like to tell the bride?
- How do they complement each other?
Now, let’s branch out into this…
How To Write The Closing Remarks of Your Humorous Best Man Toast
The examples we’ve seen earlier gives us a good idea about how to end on a memorable note. However, I am going to add a few ones to those views.
First, you may just end with a toast to the bride and groom.
See this example from the above text:
So it is now that I ask you all to join me in raising a glass to toast for one last time.
Second, a few best wishes can also be adequate if you are struggling to wrap up.
Here’s another example:
‘’I wish you both a lifetime of joy and happiness together, and may this day be the beginning of many special memories you look back on in years to come as husband and wife.
To the newlyweds, Mr & Mrs Holt!’’
Third, you can conclude with a rhyming love poem and your best man toast will be very, very memorable.
P.S: Most best men do this...Have you ever considered it? Want to write and give a great best man wedding speech but can't seem to get started because you don't know the exact words to use or where to start?
Or not too sure if what you intend writing will be well received by the guests?
Let's help you make the groom and your family and friends proud and let the wedding guests say great things about your speech.
Here’s what one nervous person called Glen sent over after the wedding was over.
Hey Dan, I just wanted to thank you once again for the speech you wrote with me. My goal was met afterward, I was told by many "what a beautiful speech" and received a standing ovation. I couldn't have done this without you. God Bless Dan!- Glen, U.S.A
Want to know how he did just that? He got on board our wedding speech program and one of our talented speech consultants helped him out.
Want to get on board? You should by first filling out this form.
This is a letter someone sent to us after we've helped him with his tribute(You can click on the image to read it)
Ok, Is This Offer For Me?
- Yes, if you are expecting nothing less than a very special, beautiful, unique, and memorable speech.
- Yes, if you are overwhelmed by the pressures of work and don’t have the time to put together a very meaningful speech, so you can have peace of mind
- Yes, if you want the groom and your family, children, friends, and wedding guests to shower you with very sincere compliments…just imagine how you will feel
- Yes, if you are not good with words and you feel you’re not a natural writer and you are struggling to find the right words but still want to give a great speech.
- Yes, you get so scared anytime you’re asked to say something before an audience and you really want to save yourself from any form of embarrassment on his big day.
- Yes, if you are not too eloquent or not too sure if you are on the right track.
- Yes, if you absolutely hate speaking in public or feel this is not your thing but you want to make your friend or brother feel very proud
- Yes, if you have a day or less to the wedding and you are worried that you might make some horrible mistakes
- Yes, if you are a good speaker but you still want someone to look over or review what you've come up with!
Wedding not too far away? Or happening in less than 24 hours? Trust me, we can deliver! it doesn’t matter if your speech is today, tomorrow, next week, next month, next year,... we can make things work for you
Just imagine leaving your entire presentation in the hands of skilled wedding speech consultants who will take away your pain of spending hours thinking hard and long about what to say and what not to say.
This is another letter someone sent to us after his wedding.(You can click on the image to read it)
Also, envision being patiently guided to say something that will leave a favorable impression on the mind of your listeners.
And also imagine the thrill and feeling of excitement and pride you’re going to experience when the audience leaps onto their feet and screams and shouts and even sing your praises.
Won’t you love that? I hope you do...
Ok, I am Interested, What’s the Cost?
You simply pay what you want after you’ve got your beautiful speech.
Why? As you know, the current health and economic crisis has caused severe hardships for most people.
Precious lives have been lost, jobs wiped out and families displaced, leaving everyone wondering what the future holds.
Yet, some couples are still getting married and asking friends and family to give speeches like never before.
Nonetheless, not everyone could afford our services even before the pandemic suddenly hit us.
So, we have dropped our normal rates so you can simply pay what you want after you have got your beautiful speech.
Please note: When life gets back to normal, this offer will be scrapped for good.
So, please take advantage of it now even if the big day is in the future.
Even though we are going through this crazy time, if you do a poor job at it, your speech will be captured on video, and the groom, your friends and family, and other viewers will forever remember what you said and would not attribute your poor performance to the fact there was a deadly disease in town.
So, please take advantage of it now even if the groom's big day is in the future by simply paying what you want after you get your beautiful speech.
Oh Ok, How Then Do I Get Started Since I Want To Get On Board Right Away?
Ok, here’s how it works
All you have to do RIGHT NOW is to click on this link to receive an easy-to-fill-in questionnaire via email. Check your email a few hours after you’ve submitted your request for your questionnaire.
So,
- After that, we will send you a very short questionnaire to fill out via email! You only have to check your email a few hours after you have made your request.
- Then, you fill out the questionnaire sent through your email and please have it sent back to us…
- We will confirm receipt of it…If something is not too clear, we will ask you to clarify….
- If not, we will send you a wonderful draft in a couple of hours if this on very short notice….If not, after a few days
- Then, you look it over and tell us if you are okay with it or you want to amend or edit or revise it till you are happy with it--although we always get it right even with the first draft.
- There will be an opportunity to give feedback and ask for edit….
Please note: The information collected through the questionnaire is only for the purpose of writing your speech. I wouldn't even need it if I could read your mind. So, your information is very confidential and no one will know about it.
Just a reminder of what you pay after it’s duly completed.
You simply pay what you want after you’ve got your beautiful speech.
Why? As you know, the current health and economic crisis has caused severe hardships for most people.
Precious lives have been lost, jobs wiped out and families displaced, leaving everyone wondering what the future holds.
Yet, some grooms are still getting married and their family and friends have to say something about them.
Nonetheless, not everyone could afford our services even before the pandemic suddenly hit us.
So, we have dropped our normal rates so you can simply pay what you want after you have got your beautiful speech.
Please note: When life gets back to normal, this offer will be scrapped for good.
So, please take advantage of it now even if the wedding day is in the future.
Even though we are going through this crazy time, if you do a poor job at it, your speech will be captured on video, and your friend or brother, family and friends, and other viewers will forever remember what you said and would not attribute your poor performance to the fact there was a deadly disease in town.
So, please take advantage of it now even if the wedding day is in the future by simply paying what you want after you get your beautiful speech.
Please note: Your speech draft comes with a proven and simple tip to master your speech or remember your speech just as you want it without carrying a paper with you.
Just see what someone said about that great tip that's proven to calm your nerves and help you speak with purpose, poise, and clarity!
''Hi Dan,
The speech went very well, I modified it a bit and practiced it as you suggested (great advice). Thanks for all your help and if I need a prepared speech again I’ll definitely contact you.
All the best,
Matt''
Please note: Don’t fill out this form if you’re a dishonest individual. This offer is for a limited time.
So, CLICK HERE TO GET STARTED NOW TO GET YOUR GREAT SPEECH NOW BY FILLING OUT A QUESTIONNAIRE---you only pay after your beautiful speech has been delivered. So, you can have peace of mind and not lose money. The risk is on us!
You don't have to worry about paying our per speech for now.
Forget about money and let’s write something for you. We believe in the values of honesty and integrity and we think you should be happy with our work first.
So, Here Are The Benefits You Get When You Get On Board!
- A great speech written by our wedding speech consultants that reflects what you want to say exactly
- We coach you on how to use your voice to make your speech very exciting.
- We show you a simple but often overlook strategy to rehearse your speech even if you have a very poor memory. This method is used by great speakers like Obama and was used by Abraham Lincoln and his compatriots
- The most effective way to get your entire speech into your head without memorizing your speech. Guaranteed to help you even if you have a very poor memory or your memory is like a goldfish…most of our clients still wonder where we got this idea from. This ensures that you don't read off a sheet of paper...
Just see what someone said about that great tip that's proven to calm your nerves and help you speak with purpose, poise, and clarity!
''Hi Dan,
The speech went very well, I modified it a bit and practiced it as you suggested (great advice). Thanks for all your help and if I need a prepared speech again I’ll definitely contact you.
All the best,
Matt''
- Ways to include humor in your speech and what it takes to do so
So, CLICK HERE TO GET STARTED NOW TO GET YOUR GREAT SPEECH NOW BY FILLING OUT A QUESTIONNAIRE---you only pay after your beautiful speech has been delivered. So, you can have peace of mind and not lose money. The risk is on us!
Remember, you have to see your speech first before you pay. So, you can relax and let us sweat it out at our expense!